Fred the Friendly – Higher Calling (ptII)

“Ahh, Fred! So nice of you to join us! We’ve been expecting you! Now let’s see here, five-foot-seven, and one of two pieces of the one. No, that won’t do at all. Let’s just make it… say… one half… yes-oh, what is that?”

“What is this place? And who are you? How di-”

“Now now, don’t mind yourself with thinking and thoughts, diddlies and dots! That’s not what it is and it is what is not, dig-diddly-dooWHOP! Yes, one half puts you at two-foot-three and three of four pieces of the one! Perfect! now we-what is it, now?”

“I said, How did I ge-”

“No, no, no. Now is not the time for questions! Didn’t I say no diddlies and no dots? Why do you new comers not ever listen, not even one, not even the once, not the one-hundredth, so many as are rays of the sun, the suns, and the sundredth! Oh, it looks like we’re done. off you go.”

This might seem odd, but it really isn’t odd at all. See, Fred was murdered violently by a rather non violent man, Gepetto to be exact. He was merely seeking a way to make a child for himself to keep him from loneliness in his old age. Unfortunately his selfishness led to the murder of two innocents, or mostly innocent I should say. And now Fred must go through the process of becoming what he was always never meant to be. A… well, I won’t ruin it for you.

“Ah, Fred! It’s good to see you! Now let me see, what shall your alias be, hum?”

“Alias? Just call me Fred sir, THANK YOU! I needn’t an alias even one bit! Now where am I?”

“Oh, you are polite! I’d even say Friendly, aye, Fred? How about that, you are Fred the Friendly!”

“I’ll show you friendly you damn puddle muck! Now answer my questions! Wha-”

“Oh! I think we’re done here. Bye bye.”

“-t is going on wit… Ahh… back down to G-d knows where… why won’t you give me a break?”

“A break? You haven’t even started.”

“Another one of you? Great. Quick! Interrupt me.”

“Really, it’s fine, I’ve got the drill. I try to figure things out and everyone ignores me, it’s fine, really.”

“Umm… hello?”


“Ah, so you are there.”

“What’s your deal?”

“My deal? I’m not sure what you’re asking.”

“What is your problem? Why won’t you speak to me?”

“I have no problem. I only speak to answer your questions. Nothing more, nothing less.”

“Great! I’ve plenty of questions. Why does it smell like basil and boiled lamb? Where are my clothes, and why do I feel so short? Where am I? How did I get here? Who are you? And, who were those other two creeps?

“Well, we just had lunch and sometimes the smell lingers on my hands. Your Earth clothes don’t follow you into your “dead body” or as I like to call it, your “Finally alive body”. You feel short because you are. You are… ooh look at that, you are out of time. Hope this was helpful! Adios!”

“Wait, you haven’t answered my questions! Why are you leaving?”

“The boss conducts all the interviews in private. I really must go.”

“Boss?… I just want to go home.”

“Home is a passing like time and space, bodies, minds and men. It’s a thing for then, and this is now. I trust Fanciflower Honeycomb, Chetnut Charley, and Tom got you up to speed?

“Who? Oh, those other midgets? No. I don’t have a clue what’s going on?”

“Really? Let’s see here. I just need to find it in the paperwork… Oh yes! So you’ve been sized up. You look… maybe… two foot even?

“Two foot three and three quarters.”

“Ah, yes, precisely what Fanciflower Honeycomb reported here. A good height! And you’ve been aliased. Fred the Friendly! Very nice. Chestnut Charley always has been good with names. Very descriptive, very exact. And finally, Tom has answered your questions.”

“Actually, no. I have many more to ask.”

“Oh! Well that won’t do at all. You were given 7 minutes exactly to be as curious as can be… according to Tom’s report you didn’t ask any questions until 6 minutes and 27 seconds. He even went 7 seconds overtime to try and acommedate. I can hardly blame Tom.”

“How did he get a report to you so quickly.”

“Now you seem to be quite inquisitive. Well, let me fill you in. I’m Willery Willerton. I run this place. My official title is too long for this meeting so you can call me DPAFGGIMISPCC17662 Willerton. The efficiency and productivity of our operation is something that might take a bit of adjusting to. We have to be precise as possible here, because over there things don’t translate to accurately. It’s the curse of magic translating between realms I suppose. There is much scholarship on the subject, but I don’t think that will be the right department for you-”

“Hold on, magic?”

“Mr. Friendly! Please don’t be so rude as to interrupt. It’s very contradictory to your name, and for goodness sakes, I just told you I’m the DPAFGGIMISPCC17662! Doesn’t that mean anything to you?”

“Well, no”

“I see… Friendly, do you know where you are or what you’ve been selected to do?”

“What do you mean selected?”

“Chosen. Set apart. Highly esteemed. Valued. Being a Fairy Godfather is a highly coveted position. You must feel extremely lucky to have been chosen for such an honored position. Your first assignment will be a young maiden by the name Rapunzel. At any rate, I see you have many questions. I’ll get Tom back in here for an additional 43 seconds.”

And so it began. Fred was unwittingly made a Fairy Godfather.

[DPAFGGIMISPCC17662: Director of Proceedings for All Fairy God Goers Intelligence and Magical Intervention Society Per Code C17662]

All the Time, Over Time

About a year ago God put a desire in my heart to pray more and lead worship less. It was odd to me, since I’ve heard of people being called into a worship leading role, and God stretching them that way, but I’ve never heard of someone who God calls out of worship leading, and into stage less worship, and prayer leading. I soon realized that I actually like that idea a lot! So I’ve pursued being on less worship teams, and spending more time praying. But in doing so, I’ve felt the constant urge to learn and grow as a pray-er. Since I’ve been looking in God’s word, and praying about praying, I’ve learned a lot of helpful things on how to grow as a pray-er that I want to share with you!

There are two ways the bible talks about praying continually. One is all the time, and the other is over time. When talking about “All-the-time” I would describe it by saying “Always means always, always.” Every moment, no exceptions. You don’t take breaks, and you don’t push pause. All the time. It’s not something you just wake up and start doing, but it’s something that takes practice, but if you pursue it, you can actually start to find significant success in praying all the time.

Then we have “Over-Time”. This means for days that turn into weeks, that turn into months, that turn into years, that turn into decades, that turn into a lifetime. We can’t grow weary and loose heart of praying for something because we don’t see immediate results. Often times God will answer a prayer in an instant. Other times, in a month. Other times, He will wait. I can’t understand God’s timing, He doesn’t owe me anything, and I can’t force Him to do anything, but I can be obedient to pray faithfully for as long as it takes.

I’ve also learned that God answers heart prayers. 1 Samuel 16:7 says “the Lord does not see as man sees; for man looks at the outward appearance, but God looks at the heart.” When applied to prayer, this means God isn’t impressed because He sees our outward enthusiasm, or loud prayers with many words. He’s looking for something else: the heart. The word doesn’t say He judges the outward appearance, and our heart. It says He only judges the heart. Certainly some people are wired a certain way that there’s a massive outward manifestation of a really sincere heart, and that’s awesome! But some people aren’t. Some people have a heart that’s totally sincere and engaged, and travailing before the Lord and the outward signs look very different.

I’ve also learned to not linger on the same topics for such a long time. When I first began prayer leading at WellHOP, and until very recently, I would pray for the same specific topic from 3 different Scripture for a whole 20 minutes (with cycles of choruses from the singers). My thought was “I’m being faithful to not give up on praying for this specific thing!” But really when praying “All-the-time” I should be hitting tons of topics, and in my personal prayers, many aren’t even intercessory. But “Over-Time” I want to continue to pray for the same specific topics, in faith that God is hearing, and answering that prayer.

Through it all, I’m excited to be in a place of prayer! Just as much as any other mission field, it’s important to continue to grow. That’s been my focus for quite a while: grow, improve, and love God!

The Parable of the Free Prisoner

There was once a family in prisoned for generations for a terrible crime. The offense was so ancient that no one remembered through the generations what it was, though there was no question that it was trecherous. There was boy born in this prison state who’s father was born in the prison and who’s father before him was born in the prison. The boy knew no other wolrd. All of life was sleeping uncomfortable on the floor- though he would not descibe it as such for he knew not of comfort. All day he worked hard in the prison doing many laborous tasks- but he did not know it was hard work for he never experienced ease or rest. The few hours he was not working or sleeping were spent in a small room barred and isolated- but he did not know isolation because he had never experienced comanionship. His stomach longed for food, and groaned thoughout the day for just a bite- but he did not know he was hungry for he had never been full. Oppression was normality.
One day the prison was no longer able to function and was closed. All the cells were opened and no guards were there to hold the prisoners any longer. The oppression ended and all were free to leave. The boy, confused and unable to fathom a life outside of the prison, was found months after the prison had closed staying in his cell. He slept on the same uncomfortable stone floor, worked the same long hours, and ate the same small portions. When asked why he did not leave and enjoy his freedom he responded feebly, for he had only known the basic speech to communicate to the guards in compliance with their orders, “I sleep, I work, I eat. What is freedom?”

Fred the Friendly – Murder Quite Rude (pt I)

“Good day, Fred!”

“Yes the day is not observably unpleasant, Mr. Rumples”

“Top of the Morn’, Fred!”

“…It’s the top of something…”

“What was that?”

“Oh yes, um… glad… the morning is.”

“Well how goes it, Fred?”

“…on and on. And you, Pete?”

“I’m quite well, thanks. Tell me, how do you do getting on?”

“…I won’t be, if that has anything to with it.”

Fred is not like you and I. See, Fred is quite unhappy in his job. Well, unhappy isn’t the right word for it. Perhaps it is better said thusly: unable to be happy. Fred works for a small accounting firm in the upper west side of somewhere irrelevant doing things that don’t matter in any sense at all. He is stuck in a meaningless job, doing meaningless things, and has an profound absense of purpose. But given the circumstance of this story that’s not all terrible; today Fred is going to die.

“Well hello Mister- what was it- Fred? And Mister Pete.”

“What can I do for you, and your very impressive sword? That looks beautiful! Is it new? I think it is new! And I suppose that then settles it. It is new after all. And if that’s it I suppose we’ll just be on our way.”

“Off so soon? We just met, and haven’t even asked my name yet!”

“Oh, we don’t mean to be rude, but we are quite busy, and must be getting along.”

“Stop. Empty your pockets. All of them… The map! I want the map you cary, Fred!”

“I’m sorry I don’t seem to have a map on my person… Have we met bef-”

Just as Fred was trying to explain himself and get an understanding on the situation he was cut short. Not just in words, but in body as well. One Geppetto Collodi ended the life of two men for a map neither of them possessed. It is not a galant tale of bravery or heroism. It is the mundane truth of how Fred the Friendly came to be.

Poetry In Motion (EXPLICIT)

I experimented today. I want to be creative but have no time or skill left to make any visual art, all of my musical gear is elsewhere, and I’m not very good anyway. I realized that in writing I am not patient enough to embark on another journey of writing at this point in life, or perhaps I’m merely uninspired.

After taking a moment to reflect on my empty spirit I realized how true this is to sin. We have a longing for righteousness, not just sinlessness. We want to build on the firm foundation, not just escape the sinking sand. However, we often find ourselves sinking and wishing we were able to stand- we have not yet even dreamed of the great buildings we can create on righteousness. So I did some improv poetry with the idea of creation and sin. It went to some pretty crazy places. Maybe one day I will return to it and make it beautiful.

Forgotten places

 In forgotten places
  there are daisies
  to love
  whether I am
  or not
  call them dogged or
  ox-eyed or
  by any name
  they are still
  a treat.

Copyright 2012 DM Denton

“Books have secrets to whisper to you, so you must be quiet to hear them.”

Too often I find myself knowing something is beautiful, somewhere, and knowing I should appreciate it, but I am distracted or busy or flustered, or all together too tied up with meaningful things. Take a moment, enjoy enjoyable things just to enjoy them.

Messica Jarks: Sea-Monster Extraordinaire

I’m actually kind of proud of this story. Love it, and deal with it.

Once upon a time in a dark dangerous land there was a magical sea dwelling monster. This monster’s name was Messica Jarks. He was terrible and great in his wisdom and magical ways, and hungry. Once he had eaten a sea anemone just to show he was the greatest and terriblest in wisdom and magical ways- and it worked.
Unfortunately for Messica Jarks his hunger could not be satisified by just one sea anemone. So this hungry, terrible and magical monster used all of his magic to eat all the sea anemones in the entire ocean! This was a problematic choice. Due to a bylaw of the magical order that binds all magical creatures, we’re all well versed in it, so I don’t need to explain here, magic is a finite source, and once depleted in each magical entity it is depleted for good. Since the algorithm used to measure the amount of magic needed to eat all anemones proved that the Messica Jarks would have to use ALL of her… I mean his… magic to eat them, he would then be without magic to keep his slim figure. He decided it was a worthy loss, and ate them all despite the consequences.
Flash forward ten minutes-> Messica Jarks, sea-monster extraordinaire is terribly fat, not hungry, and unmagical. END!